Skinny Love
by Residual-Infatuations
Summary: P.S.A- I do not know if I should continue this story. I've gotten multiple messages about how I'm making fun of people with this sickness. Not that I agree with them. It's just very annoying, to be accused of something, that wasn't my intention.
1. Chapter 1 - They're all sticks

**Chapter 1: "They're all sticks."**

* * *

Eri and Yumi had been dragging me around Tokyo for the past three hours. Stopping at all these stores for skinny girls. Normal people would take my feelings into consideration. But Eri and Yumi aren't the sharpest tools in the tool box.

"Hey Kagome, come try this on." Yumi shoved a leather mini skirt in my face.

"As if I would ever try that on. I'm a size 30, I could never fit that."

She shrugged, sashaying away. I plugged my headphones into my ears. Trying my best to ignore the beautiful woman traipsing around the store flaunting their perfect bodies. I zipped up my sweatshirt feeling more and more insecure by the second. I looked down at my thighs, I could see all the dimples surrounded by cellulite poking through my leggings. I'd been fat for as long as I could remember. In middle school the other kids would make fun of me for having a double chin. The only reason people would even acknowledge my existence is to get close to Eri or Yumi, or some other attractive girl I was friends with. I was friends with all the pretty popular girls. I wasn't sure if they befriended me out of pity or if they actually liked me for me.

"They're all sticks... lucky bitches." I whispered to myself.

They're in a world of their own, untouchable, I would never fit in with them. That's when they walked in... Inuyasha and Sesshomaru Taisho. Inuyasha was the younger brother. He was lean, easy on the eyes, in an adorable kind of way, he wasn't very smart though. He was a raging dick, except for when he wasn't trying to get into some unlucky girls pants. Then, there was Sesshomaru. He was a walking god. Chiseled in every way possible. He wasn't exactly nice, but he wasn't mean either. He mostly kept to himself, even when he was around his friends... not like he would ever give me the time of day anyways. They went straight to Eri and Yumi... no surprise there.

I walked over to them. "Can I get the keys to my car, I'm gonna go wait outside." I didn't want to be in here any longer than I had to.

Eri tossed them to me, I spun around accidentally bumping into Inuyasha.

"Watch where you're going fat ass."

"Make me dumb ass." I shoved him. I wasn't one to take shit from people... not since that day.

He tried to shove me back, but Sesshomaru got in the way. "Enough."

Our eyes locked for a quick second. I rushed out of the store, I practically jumped into the car. He called me a fat ass... in front of Sesshomaru. I just might die from embarrassment. God I was such a loser, pining over someone who didn't know i existed till now. There was a tap on the window, part of me hoped it was Sesshomaru coming to check on me. Unfortunately, it was Yumi.

I rolled down the window. "What?"

"Go home, me and Eri are gonna go hang out with the guys."

"You don't have to tell me twice." I revved up my engine and made a u-turn in the other direction.

* * *

I stared at my naked body in the mirror. Reveling in my self loathing. Poking at my rolls, my stomach was so flabby my vagina was nowhere in sight. Hidden under a mountain of skin and body fat. I begged my parents to let me get surgery. Get rid of this weight they easy way. But no, do it the right way they said. What's the whole point of having parents who are well off if you can't get any perks. I sunk to the floor bringing my knees to my chest.

"No one will ever love me, looking the way I do."

I slumped against my toilet... then I had gotten the strangest idea. I flipped open the toilet cover, hunching over. I slipped my index and middle finger down my throat. My stomach clenched, while I spilled everything into the toilet. It felt uncomfortable at first. But after, I felt relieved... lighter even.

I jumped at the loud bang on my door. "Hey Kags you in there?"

"Uh, yeah just a second."

I threw on my robe, attempmting to hide my disgusting body.

I swung open the door. "Yeah?"

Her eyes darted around my room. "Everything okay?"

My sister was always to nosy for her own good. "I'm fine Sango."

Sango, was one of them. Smart, beautiful, perfect body. It's been like that since forever. I envied her.. I guess it made me an asshole to hate my sister for being perfect. But I didn't care. In this family I was the black sheep. Being overweight and unfriendly doesn't make for a good Higarashi, my mother always said to me. The other members of my family were peppy, gorgeous and kindhearted. The complete opposite of me. I was fat, mean and full of sarcasm. I didn't belong here and everyone knew it. They're all just to nice to admit it, at least not to my face. My eyes started to sting... I hated crying. I ran into the bathroom and shoved my fingers down my throat again. I did it for the next three hours until I was somewhat satisfied. Mostly because there was nothing left to throw up. If i kept this up.. I'd finally be skinny..

I'd finally fit in.


	2. Chapter 2 - 60 Pounds-Laxatives

**Chapter 2: 60 Pounds/Laxatives**

* * *

After three weeks of starving myself, I'd finally seen some progress. A small shitty 60 pounds is all I lost. But at least it's something. This just means that i'll have to try even harder. I'd gone down two pants sizes. Most of the dimples on my ass and my thighs. My stomach was still disgusting but not as much as before though. But that wasn't enough. I needed more results. Thankfully I was home alone today, mom and dad were at work and Sango was off somewhere being perfectly perfect at everything as usual.

I went into my kitchen, grabbing everything out of cupboard and dumping it on the kitchen table. Next, the fridge. I sat down and stuffed my face. I kept shoving food down my throat, resisting the urge to gag before I finished it all. I sat there disgusted with my self. But I swallowed my self hate and told myself this was all for a good cause. I looked at my gut, it still slightly hung over my pants. I wobbled into the bathroom, bending over the toilet. I threw it up all of it and then some. I knew there was nothing left.. but I didn't stop, not until I saw blood. I washed out my mouth, and cleaned up the mess I left downstairs before anyone could see it. I had to binge... I wasn't planning on eating anytime soon.

* * *

For whatever strange reason, my mother thought it'd be nice to have "Family time". What she calls family time is sitting at the dinner table, mumbling something about your day. Knowing damn well she wasn't really paying attention. She never put her phone down long enough to see what the hell was going on around her.

My dad pushed my plate towards me. "Honey you should eat." I stared at the large stake and mash potatoes sitting on my plate. It's like they wanted me to be fat. Everyone else was eating something green. I was the only one who was being fed like some greedy animal.

"No thanks, I'm not hungry."

"Isn't that a first." It was just like my mother to take shots at me.

"Aoi, that wasn't necessary." At least he somewhat tried.

"No! Her weight is a serious problem. Do you know how embarrassing it is to have a daughter who looks like this. At the P.T.A meetings all they can talk about is her weight!"

Dad excused himself from the table. He never really defended me. He would just let her shit all over me whenever she pleased as many times as she pleased.

"Mom, you shouldn't talk to her like that."

"Well Sango, if your sister was more like you I wouldn't have to."

Sango looked into my eyes. She was sorry, but I knew she couldn't do anything about any of this... it wasn't her fault. She didn't make mom this way.

"It's okay." I mouthed. She nodded, giving me a sad smile.

I left the table, grabbing my car keys off the counter. "Where do you think you're going young lady?"

"As if you actually care mother."

I got in my car and drove to the nearest drug store. I grabbed an armful of laxatives and dropped them on the counter. The clerk was a prissy perfect Barbie doll. Blue eyes blond hair, perfect cheek bones. She must be American, no one here looked the way that she did.

She laughed. "Some one must be backed up."

Yeah she was definitely American, her accent was crap. "Just ring me up." I grabbed two water bottles at the last minute. I watched her as she had trouble counting my change. I guess it was true what they say about blonds. But after a long agonizing five minutes she finally managed to figure it out. I snatched my bag and my change from her. I sat in my car ripping the open a box. I took four of them leaving the other four in the pack. I downed some of my water, waiting for the laxatives to kick in.

* * *

They worked faster than I expected. I was on the expressway, when it hit me. I had to pull over and now I was crouching over a bush. Shitting my brains out, at one point I could've sworn I had torn myself a new asshole with the amount of shit that was coming out. I'd spent about fifteen minutes crapping my guts out, over a bush that I'm pretty sure was poison ivy. But it had finally stopped. I grabbed some tissue out of my back pocket, wiping the it away. I pulled up my pants, getting in my car and driving home. Fortunately everyone had gone to sleep, I wasn't in the mood for talking. I went straight for the shower washing the smell away. I stepped out looking into the mirror. I gripped my stomach, I needed this to disappear. The longer it stayed, the longer I'd be ridiculed. The longer I'd be an outsider.


	3. Chapter 3 - Notice me

**Chapter 3: "Notice me."**

I'd been taking the laxatives for about a month now. Guys around school have been noticing how much skinnier I've gotten. I was almost there. I was only seven sizes away from Sango. I needed to push myself even further. My arms didn't jiggle anymore. The dimples and cellulite were gone. My gut didn't hang over my pants as much as it use to. But it still stuck out like a soar thumb. My mom didn't rip on me as much as she use to either. A snarky remark here and there. But it proves that being skinny fixes everything. I had to buy new clothes, because of how much weight I'd lost. 125 pounds. I weighed 175 now. Just a little more I kept telling myself.

There was a knock at my door. "Hey Kags are you ready!?"

"Yeah I'm coming." I grabbed my car keys off the dresser opening my door. "Let's go."

* * *

"I'm so proud of you for losing all this weight Kagome. How'd you do it?"

"Thanks Sango. That... is my little secret."

She stroked my hair. "Well keep up the good work."

"I will, I'm just tired of being fat and disgusting."

"Kagome you don't need to be skinny for people to like you. I like you just the way you are. You should too."

"You might like me this way Sango. But other people treat fat people like crap. Especially me, I was out with Eri and Yumi and someone called me a fat-ass."

"Who the hell called you that?" She asked.

"It doesn't matter now, because when I'm skinny I'll be beautiful."

She sighed, rubbing my shoulder.

I pulled into the school parking lot, parking in my usual spot.

"See you later Kags." I watched her run off to her clique of perfect friends. That'd be me soon. I walked up to school, pushing the double doors open. Crap... Inuyasha and his douchebag friends were standing right in front of my class... Sesshomaru was there too. I swallowed my pride and starred walking.

"Hey get out the way guys, lard ass incoming."

"Screw you Inuyasha."

"As if I'd ever put my dick anywhere near you. Probably couldn't even find your cunt underneath all that fat."

I stopped dead in my tracks, turning to him. "You know Inuyasha, people like you who always try and make others feel inadequate are over usually compensating."

"Overcompensate? I don't know what that is but I don't do it."

"It means you lack in another department so you act like an asshole to make up for it."

"Have you seen me? I don't lack anything."

"Maybe you act this way because your stupid or because Kikyo's telling everyone how little your dick actually is."

Ooo's came from all his friends and I noticed out of the corner of my eye Sesshomaru smiling. I turned my back on them walking into class and sitting down. Contemplating the fact that Sesshomaru was smiling because of me.

* * *

Sesshomaru sat right beside me, which was strange. His usual seat was in the front. He hadn't looked my way not once and class was almost over. I wanted him to look my way, at least once. The bell rang, I sighed. Grabbing my stuff and leaving. I walked into the hallway, I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Sheesomaru!? Can I help you?"

He looked me up and down. "Never mind." He said walking away from me.

I disgusted him. One look at me sent him running. I fought the urge to cry. I ran into the bathroom, locking myself into a stall. I quietly cried in my hands. I was in there for what felt like forever. I sucked it up and wiped my treasure away. I stepped out and saw a girl I'd never seen before. She was pale and skinny... to skinny. Most of her bones stuck out.

She caught me staring. "Can I help you?"

"Sorry.. I've just never seen you before."

She stuck out her hand. "The names Kagura. You are?"

I shook it. "Kagome. Kagome Higarashi, nice to meet you."

She leaned up against the wall. "So, why were you crying."

"Just some stupid boy."

I watched her dig in her purse pulling out a a small vile. She leaned her head back and snorted the white powder.

"I won't tell if you won't."

"My lips are sealed. So.. what is that?" I didn't know much about drugs.

"Coke. Want some?" I was about to say no but she interrupted me. "Before you say no. It helps you lose weight. It's the reason I'm not fat anymore." She dusted the power of her nose.

"There's no way you use to be fat."

"This was me 1 year ago." She pulled out her phone, showing me a picture of a young fat little girl. It had to be her... they had the same ruby eyes and jet black hair.

"Wow." I was jealous.

She held out another vile to me. "Come on. A little won't hurt."

I stared at it long and hard. I took it from her, holding it between my fingers... it wouldn't hurt besides, anything to be skinny... anything to be perfect.


	4. Chapter 4 - Xenical

**Chapter 4 : Xenical (Orlistat)**

It had been three days. Three days of nothing but water and cocaine. Kagura had been sharing her stash with me, and for that I was grateful. Being high like this, helped me ignore the hunger pains of my stomach crying out for any morsel of food. I laid in bed, coming down from my high. I could feel everything. The blood running through my veins, the sound of my heartbeat vibrated my entire body. I could finally sit up, I stood up wobbling over to the mirror. In these three days I had lost a whole 20 pounds. I couldn't stop smiling, my double chin was finally gone. I looked semi normal, from the neck down anyways. My back rolls were gone too. Glad I found cocaine when I did. Just a little but longer, and I'd finally be perfect.

I rummaged through my bag looking for more but I was all out. I grabbed my phone dialing Kagura's number.

"Hello?"

"Yeah, Kagura it's me Kagome. I was wondering if you had some more... you know."

"Of course, give me your address. I'll be right over.

I gave it to her, she said she'd be here 20 minutes or less. In the meantime I went into the kitchen and binge all the left overs. Then the doorbell rang. I jogged over to the door opening it. It was Kagura, a strange man stood next to her.

"Who's this?"

"Don't worry he's just my ride. Go wait in the car."

The way he looked at me gave me the creeps. It's like he wanted... to eat me or something. He stared at me his entire walk down the driveway. He even stared through his car window. I slammed the door shut right after Kagura walked in.

"Who the hell is that creep?!"

She laughed. "That creep is my brother and my supplier."

I stayed silent. "It's okay though, he is a creep. But his shit is the best." She waved a little baggie in my face.

"What's that?"

"It's Xenical."

"Xenical?"

"Yeah I took them from my mom. Whenever I get bored of the regular stuff, I just pick from one of her many drug in her bathroom cabinet. This one is a weight loss drug and I brought it just for you."

"No fucking way, oh my god thank you. How many can you take at a time?"

"Up to three an hour."

"How well do they work?"

"Let's just say my mom use to be obese, and now she's not."

I was like a kid who'd just gotten a brand new toy. I counted all the pills in the baggie, there were twelve in total.

"Well," She walked towards the door. "I will be seeing you later. Enjoy." She left closing the door behind her.

Then it hit me, I finally remembered. I sprinted to the bathroom, flinging open the toilet seat and spilling my insides into the toilet-bowl. How could I be so careless, I'd almost forgotten to throw it all up. All of this work would have been for nothing. I stood up, washing the taste of vomit out of my mouth. I toyed with the pills rolling the between my fingers... maybe If I take more than three it would make up for some of the food I had already digested. I opened the baggie, taking out eight pills. I threw my head back and popped all eight of them into my mouth and downing some water from the sink. Now hopefully everything would be okay.

* * *

I didn't even remember falling asleep. I stumbled out of bed, it was getting harder and harder to breath by the second. My visions got so blurry I'd walked into a wall and hit fell straight to the floor. I couldn't move, the more I struggled the harder it became for me to breath. There was a buzzing sound in my ears. I could feel by oxygen deprived brain pulsing. I started to slowly fade as it all went black.


	5. Chapter 5 - I did it

**Chapter 5: "I did it."**

I had passed out Friday night. But when I woke up in the hallway sprawled out on the floor. I had checked my phone and it was Monday morning. No one had come home to check on me, they were all gone. For the entire weekend... I guess I wasn't important to anyone. It didn't matter... as long as I got thinner I didn't need anyone. I was drenched in sweat, how could I have been sweating for a whole two days straight. I brushed it of and walked into my bathroom.

I stepped on my scale... and I couldn't believe my eyes. It said one twenty one. I stepped off and tried again, it must have been broken. I ran back into my room tearing off my shirt, staring at my reflect. My body... it was perfect. No lumps, no dimples, no cellulite. These fucking pills were magical. There's no way I could wear my clothes now. I walked out of my room going into Sango's. I sifted through her draw's looking for something to wear, I'm sure she wouldn't mind.

I pulled out a pair skinny jeans, with a white tank top with a bra and underwear. I would have to go shopping since all my clothes were to big now. I borrowed a pair of her flats too. Not because I needed to, but because I was to lazy to get my own shoes. I looked myself over in the mirror. It's like I had completely switched bodies with Sango. Her clothes fit perfectly. I almost cried at how skinny I'd gotten. I ran back into my room, grabbing my book bag and the pills Kagura had gave me and stuffed them in my bra.

I went downstairs, grabbing my keys off the table. I slipped outside closing the door behind me. I got in my car and drove to school, I couldn't wait to show off my new body to everyone.

* * *

I'd been sitting in the parking lot for about twenty minutes. I don't get it, when I was a fat slob I could walk straight through those double doors and not bat an eye. But now.. I was beautiful, I could finally fit in. But here I was sitting in my car nervous. Scared about what other people might say.

"Fuck it." I said.

I got out locking my car. I marched up to those double doors and kicked them open. Well I didn't kick them, more like gently pushed. It looked like 1st periods just ended and clutters of students flooded the hallway. It's like time had stopped, and all these shit heads eye landed on me. I could already here them whispering about. One person even said, she probably had surgery there's no way she lost all that weight on her own. I shrugged it off and kept walking. I opened my locker and shoved my books inside.

"Kagome?"

" Oh Inuyasha it's you. I thought I smelt garbage."

"Ha very funny. So, where'd you put it?"

What the hell was he talking about. " Where'd I put what?"

He laughed. "Where'd you put the rest of you. What'd you do, ask daddy to buy you a new body?"

"Fuck off Inuyasha. Don't you have some girl to disappoint with your little.. well you know."

"Yeah whatever, just because you look different won't change how you are on the inside." "Yeah and it doesn't change the fact that since I look good now you want to be in my insides."

He was red as a Tomato. I couldn't blame him though, I looked good. I pushed past him, bumping him with my shoulder. I stepped in the classroom and a couple girls even gasped. Two of those girls were Eri and Yumi. Everyone's eyes were on me.. everyone except Sesshomaru. What would it take for him to notice me.

* * *

2nd period was painstakingly long, but it had finally ended. I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Sesshomaru was rushing out of class. I rushed out following a few steps behind him, so he wouldn't notice me. He went into a staircase as sat in the back. I swallowed my pride and followed him.

He looked up from his book. "Higarashi?"

"What's your problem?"

"Excuse me?

"What's it going to take for you to notice me.. am I not pretty enough for you? You've given every other girl the time of day except me.. why?"

He stood up, towering over me. "Get this straight. I do not give any girl the type of day. I let them speak then I shoot down whatever hope they think they have of being with me." He came closer backing up against the wall. " Secondly," he grabbed my chin tilting my head upward. "I struggle everyday not to notice you because my Idiot brother begged me to stay away from you."

"Why?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper.

"He has feelings for you."

"What? No, we hate each other."

"He's to embarrassed to admit his feelings."

"What about you?"

He eyed me. "What about me?"

"How do you feel... about me."

"Does it matter?"

"Yeah it does."

"I gave Inuyasha my word I wouldn't touch you."

I but the inside of my cheek. "Fine."

He started walking away, then he suddenly stopped.

He turned to me, looking me in the eyes. "Screw it."

He slipped his hands into my hair. Smashing his lips onto mine. Hesuckled and nibbled on my bottom lip. Slipping his tongue past my lips, swirling his tongue around mine. I was stuck, I've never done this kind of thing before. Especially with someone who looked like Sesshomaru. I melted in his arms. He pulled his lips away from mine. He took my breath away. I opened my eyes and he was smiling.

"I'll see you around Higarashi."

I watched him walk away. My heart wouldn't stop beating. He finally noticed me because of how skinny I was. If I wanted to keep his I'd have to keep going. I'd have to get thinner...


	6. Chapter 6 - He's mine

**Chapter 6: "He's mine."**

I finished all the pills Kagura had given me, I'd have to call her soon to get some more. I couldn't stop staring at myself in the mirror. My cheekbones showed more. My frame was smaller. My ribs poked out a little but that's okay, you could only see the top ones. My ass was smaller, Sesshomaru kissed me. Life was perfect. I had gone shopping with Sango to buy a whole new wardrobe. For the first time in my life, guy's noticed me before they did her. I turned them all down though, I only had eyes for one boy.

There was a knock at my door. "Hey Kags dinner is ready."

I slipped on a pair of pajama shorts and spaghetti strapped T.

I ran downstairs sitting down at the table.

"Is that really anyway to dress at the dinner table Kagome."

I'd had it with her ripping on me. I'd had it with dad never defending me. Sango.. she's fine I love her. But mom had taken it to far.

"What the hell is your problem?"

"Watch your mouth!"

"NO! Nothing is ever good enough. My weight was a problem I fixed it. Now what I wear to the dinner table is a Problem. Are you fucking kidding me?!"

"I'll say this again, watch your mouth. Just because you've changed how you are on the inside. Doesn't mean that your attitude and how you are on the inside has changed."

"Enough-"

I cut him off. " No dad! She'll never accept me for the way I am. You of all people should know that. You think we haven't noticed that you go into work all the time, even when you don't need to? It's to get away from her, don't hide it."

He stayed silent. "Yeah, that's what I thought."

"Come on Kagome ease up."

"No, I won't. When has she ever left me alone? I know you love mom. You're her perfect child. Her first born. The only reason you spend so much time with her is because you see how lonely she is."

She avoided moms gaze. "Everyone thinks we're the perfect family, but the truth is. We couldn't be more far from it."

"Screw all you well, not you Sango I still love you."

She laughed, shaking her head. I ran upstairs into my room slamming the door behind me, not wanting to be apart of the turmoil that I'd just started. Not more than five minutes later they were all arguing. I just slid into bed letting them wallow in their problems, it's about time we acknowledged the fact that we all had issues in this family...

* * *

The car ride to school was awkward.

"You know what you did last night was wrong right?"

I shrugged. "They had it coming. She treats me like crap and dad lets her, just so they won't have to face up to the fact that they're both shitty people."

"You could have done it another way you know."

"Honestly I really couldn't have. I refuse to be a dumping ground for their defensive projection."

She sighed, patting my head. I parked my car and we said our goodbye's. I walked into school, ignoring the whistles coming from all the guys. I went straight to my locker. I shoved my backpack inside. I wasn't really in the mood to do any work today, not after last night. I slumped against my locker, I don't know why I even came to school today. I notice Sesshomaru down the hallway looking at me. We stared at each other for a while, until Inuyasha noticed and walked over to me.

"What's going on between you and my brother?"

"What? No name calling today."

He didn't even try. "Seriously, what's going on between you two. I noticed the both of you staring at each other."

"Nothing is going between and even if there was it's none of your business to be honest."

He smiled good. "So, what are you doing this Saturday?"

I folded my arms. "Why?"

"I want you to go out on a date with me. Why else?"

"No."

"What why not?"

"Well, for one I don't like you. Secondly, I have feelings for someone else."

He got closer. "I bet you I'm better than him"

"You're not even close to what he is."

I saw Sesshomaru smiling, so he was eavesdropping.

"So if you'll excuse me, I have to get to gym." I walked away from him, while he just stood there looking stupid.

* * *

I didn't even go up to the gym, I was just laying down on the bench in the locker room. I sat up, something catching my eye. The name Onigumo, on the locker. That was Kagura's last name. I opened her locker, being nosy I unzipped her bag and there they were... The pills sitting next to two vile's of cocaine,. Maybe she wouldn't miss them. I opened the bottle. Poring the pills into my front pockets, and taking a vile for myself.

The bell rang. "Shit." I threw the bottle back in her bag zipping it up. I couldn't hide them in my locker.

I ran out into the hallway, going to Sango's locker digging the pills out of my, and dumping them into a small pocket in her handbag. I closed the locker just in time. The hallway flooded with students. Shit, Kagura charged towards me shoving me into the locker.

I shoved her back. "What the fuck is your problem?!"

She swung at me. "He's mine!"

I dodged her punch. "Who the hell are you talking about?!"

"Sesshomaru, Is mine!"

I stopped. No the hell she did not just say that. I punched her in the jaw as hard as I could. She staggered back and dropped to the floor.

"God that hurt." I rubbed my knuckles.

The security guards came, taking us both away.

* * *

"So Miss Higarashi. Miss Onigumo is fine but she refuses to tell us what the fight was about. I hoping you could shed some light on the situation."

I had to play this right. "Principal Tanaka, she attacked me in the hallway because I knew about her drugs and she tried to scare me into staying quiet. But it didn't work, her plan backfired on her." I lied.

"DRUGS!?"

"Yes sir, drugs. They're in her gym locker. I saw them she was changing."

He rushed out of the office leaving the door wide open. About 30 minutes later, cops were dragging Kagura away. She was kicking and screaming, saying the drugs weren't hers. I Knocked my head back, pour the vile up my nose, brushing away the rest and shoving it back in my pocket.

I didn't feel bad about what I'd done. I won't let anyone get in the way of my happiness, besides. "He's mine."


	7. Chapter 7 - More

**Chapter 7: More.**

I looked down at the scale, it read 95 pounds. Maybe ten more pounds wouldn't hurt. Fortunately, I'd gotten to take the pills out before Sango found them. I got dressed and got in my car. I wasn't really sure where I was going, I just know I didn't feel like being at home. I drove for about twenty minutes until I found myself in the heart of Tokyo. The smell of food was swirling all around. The aroma of eel flooded my nose. My stomach cried out in hunger and pain. I tried my best to ignore it... but I couldn't. I ran into the restaurant, not even locking my car door. I ordered everything. Once everything was finished, I carried it out to my car and put it in the back seat. I drove to Shonan, and parked right on the sand. I ripped open the first bag. Just looking at it made my mouth water. I shoved it in my mouth. I practically swallowed it whole. There was no time to chew, I was starving. It only took me about fifteen minutes to swallow the ten plus bags of fast food. I leaned my chair back, I was so full I drifted off into food induced sleep.

* * *

I woke up with a slight stomach ache. It was night now. I rubbed my eyes, trying to get rid of my blurry vision. I looked at my phone.. shit, it was 10:00. More than six hours had passed. That was more than enough time to digest all the food. How the he'll could I be so fucking stupid. I opened my glove compartment, frantically digging through the junk. I pulled out, the pills I'd stolen from Kagura and the laxatives. I was freaking out. Everything I'd done so far was at risk. All because I wanted to be weak and stuff my face. I poured the pills into my mouth. Next, the laxatives. I grabbed a bottle of water from my backseat, washing it all down. I got dizzy, my stomach made these strange noises I've never heard before. I shrugged it off, telling myself it was nothing. I reached under my seat, pulling out some leftover cocaine I had. I snorted the rest of the vile, hoping to take the edge off my dizziness.

Literally seconds later it kicked in. My high had taken over. I'd gotten out of my car, walking past the happy families. Kicking sand at them, I envied the bliss. I walked away, ignoring the kids mother, telling me how I was a "Bad seed." All I could focus on now was the water. It's like it calling out to me. Each wave just kept pulling me in close and closer. I felt the old water wash over my feet. Then.. I felt a pain in my chest. It's liked I'd been punch straight in the heart. I couldn't breath. Everything went blurry. I dropped face first into the sand. I thought I was dying and honestly... that didn't bother me.

* * *

I woke up in a hospital, tubes running in and out of my arms. All these stupid wire attached to my chest and my temples. The most uncomfortable part was the catheter between my legs. I tried to move but I was handcuffed to the bed-rails.

I heard voices from behind the curtain. "Mr. and Mrs. Higarashi, we pumped her stomach and found a mixture of laxatives with another unknown pill. We ran tests and found traces of cocaine her system.

"Oh god." She'd said.

Just great, Sango was here to.

"I can hear all of you."

The curtain was drawn. "Kagome drugs? Have you lost your mind?!"

"Oh please dad, don't act like you care about me."

He stormed off. "Yeah walk away like you always do!"

My mother sat on the foot of my bed. "Kagome.. please why would you do this? Weren't you happy?"

"Happy?" This lady was hard of hearing. "Haven't you heard what I've been saying this entire time? No I'm not happy. I did this because I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to be beautiful and now I am. I won't let anyone take that from me."

"See? It's okay doctor. She just wanted to lose some weight, there's nothing wrong with that. Her taking the initiative to drop this weight was the wrong thing to do. There's nothing wrong with her. So I would like to take her home now."

"Mrs. Higarashi.. I don't think you understand the severity of the situation. Your daughter has been starving herself for months. She continues to starve herself even though she has already become thin."

"What? Why on earth would she do that?"

"For God's sake! Open your eyes mom! She's sick, you wanted her to lose weight so bad that you can't see that she's hurting herself and it's mostly your fault!"

"Sango-"

"No! This is your fault, and you to caught up in your own world to notice what's going on with your own daughter!"

She patted my head and kissed my forehead, then she walked away wiping her tears.

"I'm sorry Doctor, but I'll be taking my daughter home now."

"I'm sorry Mrs. Higarashi, but that won't be possible. I've made arrangements for her to go to a facility where she can get the help she needs.

"What! There's nothing wrong with me! LET ME GO!"

I struggled, trying to pull my hands out of the restraints . Next thing I knew two men dressed in white held me down, and gave me a shot right in the neck. I tried to keep struggling put my body got tired. My eyelids became heavy. I felt myself slipping...

What the hell did I get myself into...


	8. Chapter 8 - The Mac

**Chapter 8: The MAC.**

The Mac, also known as the Macintosh. Osaka's best rehabilitation center. At least that's what they say. I've only been here for about three weeks and I could see how shitty this place was. No one here will ever get better. The staff sneak things in for the patients. In return they want a favor... a sexual favor. The dope heads were always doped up, the junkies were always high and no one even knew why. They probably did know, they just buried it. So they could keep their good reputation. They weren't allowed to force feed me here, that violated my rights. I'd refused all food and meds they tried to give me. Am I sick? Hell no, I just want to be beautiful. But no, i had to be locked up with the lot of these asshole's and share my feelings. Why I am the way I am.

Now here I was sitting across from this thirty something year old guy who wants to be my "friend".

"How are you today Kagome?" He asked.

"I'm fine."

"Oh. Two words? That's better than you did yesterday."

"Why am I here?"

He smiled. " I'm here to help you Kagome."

"Yeah right, and stop saying my name like that. Acting as if you've known me my whole life."

He sighed, and scribbled something down on his notepad. "If you eat something, you'll get a reward."

"What am I a dog? You have nothing I want that could make me eat."

He smiled. "Oh? Not even Sesshomaru?"

"You're lying. He's not here." I said rolling my eyes.

"That isn't true. He's been trying to see you since your first day here."

"Why didn't you tell me?!"

He smirked. "I promised myself I wouldn't tell you until you made some progress. So, are you willing to try and eat something?"

I'd do anything to see him.. "What is it?"

He reached into his satchel pulling out a sandwich. My mouth stared to water but my brain screamed don't take it.

"Don't worry. It's only two hundred and twenty two calories. That isn't enough to effect your weight. It's on wheat bread, turkey and mayonnaise.. here"

He held it out to me. I hesitated... anything to see Sesshomaru, I told myself. I took it from him, unwrapping it. I sucked it all in, it was gone in about three or four bites."

He handed me a bottle of water. I downed it in ten seconds flat. I didn't realize how hungry I actually was.. honestly, I wanted more. It's like he was reading my mind, he handed me a chocolate bar next. I savored every single piece.

"That's enough for today. But, if you do get hungry the cafeteria is always open to you."

His phone vibrated. "Are you ready?"

"Ready for what?"

"To see him."

I shot up to my feet. "I'm ready."

* * *

The had me waiting in the courtyard, I couldn't stop pacing back and forth. I was so nervous..

"Kagome."

I stopped dead in my tacks, I slowly turned around. My heart skipped a beat... there he was.

"Sesshomaru." I ran into his arms, he spun me around. Burying his face into my hair.

He kissed me, so soft, so sweet. I missed the way his lips felt on mine. We broke the kiss just staring into each others eyes. We stayed like that for a while, embracing one another.

"Kagome, we need to talk."

We walked over to the bench sitting down. "What is it?"

"Why?"

"Why what?" I asked confused.

"Why would you do this to yourself? You could have died!"

I flinched at how loud he was. "I.. I wanted to be beautiful, I wanted to fit in... I wanted you to notice me."

"Notice you?" He grabbed the sides of my face, looking me in the eyes. "Kagome, I've noticed you everyday for the last three years. I liked you just the way you were. You didn't have to starve yourself to get my attention."

"If I would've came to you the way I was before, spilling out my heart to you. What you have done?"

He slipped his hands into my hair, pressing his forehead against mine. "It wouldn't have changed a thing."

My eyes started to sting... I hated crying. "You don't mean that."

"I do Kagome."

"So if i was a flat slob you'd still want me?"

He smiled. "I wouldn't care if you were a fat slob. As long as you were my fat slob."

I laughed, and for the first time in a long time, it was real.

"There's something I need to tell you."

Maybe he changed his mind about us..."What is it?"

"It's about your family?"

"Oh god please tell me they aren't coming."

"No... that's not it. Your parents, they got a divorce."

"Saw that one coming. So where did my dad run off to?"

"It's not just your dad Kagome... they've all left."


	9. Chapter 9 - What!

**Chapter 9: "What?"**

I must have heard wrong. "They what?"

"They're gone Kagome."

"Gone? Gone where? It's only been a couple weeks, what the hell happened?!"

"I hate to say it like this but.. it's you. Sango said they left because of you. Well, the divorce wasn't your fault. Like you said, that was bound to happen. Sango told me that your mother left without telling your dad where she was going. Your father doesn't want to see you because... he's ashamed. He let your mother ridicule you for to long. He sat there and let your mother verbally abuse you just because he wanted to avoided it himself."

"And Sango..."

"She felt responsible for not noticing how sick you were sooner. She never realized how much pain you were in everyday. Especially having to live with her. She assumed you thought she flaunted her looks in your face."

"So this is all my fault."

"That isn't what I'm saying."

"So then what are you saying?!"

"They're being cowards. Instead of facing you and apologizing for how they've neglected you. They chose to run and hide, until they feel like showing their faces."

"So.. it's not my fault... but it's my fault."

He sighed, rubbing his temples. "Listen, your father and Sango aren't going to be gone forever. They just want to give you some space. Your father is still paying the mortgage for your house. So you can stay there when you get out or... you could stay with me if you'd like."

I looked at him shocked. "What?"

"If that's something you'd be into." He said blushing.

Sesshomaru and me alone in a house... it was a dream come true.

"Y-yes I'd love to go, whenever you're ready. We could leave right now." I stood up, but he grabbed my hand.

"Until you're better. You can't leave.'

"But you said..."

"I know what I said. What I meant is, after you get better you can come stay with me."

I plopped back down onto the bench. "Great I'm still stuck here."

He stoked my cheek. "Don't worry you'll be out of here soon enough."

Before I could even get a word out edgewise, some big burly nurse, decided to move right on in and ruin my time with Sesshomaru.

"Times up Higarashi."

"Oh come on, five more minutes!"

"It's okay Kagome. I'll see you later." He pecked me on the lips.

Disappearing behind the white double doors. I didn't think it was possible but I actually hated this place even more.

* * *

I was sitting in group, daydreaming about running my fingers through Sesshomaru's hair all day. Unfortunately, I was snapped back to reality.

"What Shippo?"

"Ms. Higarashi, remember it's Dr. Tengo not Shippo."

I looked at him. "Sure, whatever you say Shippo."

He sighed. "Anyway, where were we. Ah yes, what was one thing that made you happy today Ms. Higarashi?"

He smiled at me. He knew I never shared anything during group time. Mostly because I never had anything to share. But he knew Sesshomaru had made me happy, by coming to see me. But that wasn't his plan. He wanted me to become friends with these doped up nut cases. As if I'd ever be so stupid to trust them with my secrets. But then I had got an idea.

"Something did make me happy today."

"Oh? Please do share Ms. Higarashi."

"I ate something today." That earned me some applause, from my prison mates.

Shippo glared at me, his orange brows furrowed over his green eyes. "Anything else Ms. Higarashi?"

"Nope. Not a thing." I lied.

"If you don't participate the right way Ms. Higarashi, you won't get better and you will not be able to leave."

"Is that a threat?"

"Call it what you want."

"I'll be dammed if some ginger threatens to keep me locked up in here just because I don't want to tell a bunch of societies rejects about my personal life."

I could feel everyone's eyes on me. I knew what I'd just said was harsh, but I didn't care.

"If we're rejects, what does that make you?" It was Kaede, she had gotten so high off her ass once. She'd gotten into something crazy and she'd ended up taking out her own eye. She claimed, the voices in her head told her to do it. She had to wear this raggedy black eye patch to cover up the gnarly scar.

"I'm no reject. I just happened to get thrown in here with the rest of you ingrates."

"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Shippo had never yelled at me before... that caught me off guard. "You have absolutely no right to come in here and look down on everyone when you have your own problems Ms. Higarashi. So if you plan to get out of here anytime soon. You will participate."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. I had to do whatever it took to get out of here... "Fine. My name is Kagome Higarashi and I'm... Bulimic. Who's sometimes a drug addict."


	10. Chapter 10 - Family Day

**Chapter 10: "Family time."**

After my outburst in group, Shippo decided to punish me by taking away my visitation rights. It'd had been an entire month without Sesshomaru, and I was going through withdrawals. Until I officially apologized to the group... I wouldn't get to see him. Like what more did the old man want from me? I Participated in group, asking for anything else was just pushing it. I'd managed to hide in the corner watching everyone setting up. I envied them... their families would be coming to visit them. Despite how fucked up my family may be. They were still my family... and I loved them... kind of.

* * *

Two hours had passed, as I watched them hugging their mother, fathers, sisters, brothers. There were even some grandparents. You know who showed up for me? No one, I guess they didn't love me as much as I did them. I know I could be a pain sometimes, that I spoke without thinking. But I wasn't that bad was I? I was still lovable... Seconds later Shippo interrupted me, pulling me out of my dark depressing thoughts.

"Are you okay Higarashi?"

"If you're asking me, if my family not being here bothers me. No it doesn't. I'm fine." I lied.

I could see the pity in his eyes. "We're expecting a new patient in a couple days."

"You're telling me this because?"

"I'm just trying to get your mind off of family day."

"Well, you failed. Miserably."

He chuckled. "Come, follow me."

I followed him out of the meeting room into his office. It was completely different than I thought it would be. I expected ink blots, the curvy chair patients would lay on and spill the inner most darkest secrets. It was dark... comforting. I sat down in the midnight colored armchair.

"OK. We're going to try something."

"Something like?"

"Don't worry it won't hurt, it's to help you relax. So you can't be more.. trusting. "

"Put this on." He handed me a blindfold.

"Your not going to feel me up are you."

"Ha ha very funny Ms. Higarashi."

I slipped it over my eyes, leaning back into the chair. I heard him flick the lights off. It sounded like he was rearranging the furniture. His hands rapped around my ankles, sending shivers up my spine. He slipped off my shoes, his hands were soft and warm. He started to massage my feet, I melted as he worked his hands over the sole of my foot.

"Talk to me Kagome., what's going on?

"Kagome? What happened to miss Higarashi?"

"Talk."

I sighed. "Fine. Well, what do you want to know Shippo."

"Why were you sulking today?"

"No one came to see me."

"So, I was right. Your family not being here bothers you."

"They're messed up, but they're my family. Plus, no one likes to be alone."

"What about Sesshomaru?"

"What about him?"

"How do you feel about him? Would you say that you loved him?"

"I do."

"How do you know that for sure."

Usually I would've never opened up to him, but the was his hands were working my feet. I just couldn't stop talking.

"What do you mean how do I know? They're my feelings after all."

"Yes, but how do you know for sure?"

"I've wanted to be with him since the moment I laid eyes on him. He's perfect."

"Maybe you don't love him. you're just in love with the thought of him?"

"I don't think so."

"Think about it. You strive for perfection, and if you can't have it. It drives you mad, to the point where you have to harm yourself to feel better. You thought your family would finally be okay if you lost weight. When that didn't happen, you ended up in the hospital nearly dead. Now that your family is gone, Sesshomaru is all you have left. You see him as perfect, so if you were able to make him yours. All of this wouldn't have been for nothing."

"You're wrong."

"Look me in the eyes and tell me I'm wrong."

I slipped off the blindfold, ready to give him a piece of my mind... but I couldn't. The moment my brown eyes met with his green ones... I'd gotten lost. Lost in those deep emerald pools that sat below furrowed ginger brows.

"Well?"

"I can't." The words wouldn't come out. I didn't notice how hot he actually was until now. I shouldn't be having thoughts like this, but I couldn't help myself.

"Why is that Kagome?"

The way my name slipped past his lips excited me. "It's s because I want to be perfect, I want to fit in. In high school it's all about being perfect. Being with Sesshomaru, is as perfect as I could get."

He placed my left foot down, grabbing the right and started working his magic. While i waited for him to speak, my eyes started to wander. His lips were a soft pink color, his tie had been loosened. his sleeves had been rolled up, the veins bulging out of his arms.

He finally spoke. "What about after high school? What else will it take for you to become perfect? How far will you take it, just to become perfect in your own sense?"

I mulled it over... he was right. I didn't love him. I didn't really want him either, I just needed him to make myself feel better. At the time it felt so right, but the more I think about it I didn't need Sesshomaru to make me perfect.

What I really want. No, what I really need is... to start loosing weight again... that's the only thing that really makes me happy.


	11. Chapter 11 - Three more days

**Chapter 11: Three More Days**

Just one more week and I'd finally be set free from this prison. All I had to do was keep playing along, acting like eating made me happy. When the truth is, I couldn't stand the taste or the smell. When it touches my tongue, I had to fight the urge to throw it across the room. I'd started to gain weight. I was going to lose my fucking mind if i didn't shed all this weight soon. I finally gave up sulking; and got ready for my session with Shippo.

* * *

I sat across from him, we just stared at each other. Every few minutes or so he'd write in his little note pad.

"What no foot massages today?"

"That was a one time thing Ms. Higarashi."

"I figured. So, what's with the awkward silence?"

"You will be 18 in the next three days, and after that we won't be able to legally hold you. So it's up to you to choose what you want to do."

"So I can either stay here, or finally be free of this shitty place."

He sighed. "You can do that. Or, choose the third option."

"Third option?"

"Move in with me and allow me to work with you personally."

"I don't know doc, that sounds inappropriate." I teased.

"Au contraire Ms. Higarashi, it has been approved many times. If the patient has proved to be a danger to themselves."

"I'm not a danger to myself. You said it yourself, you told me I was getting better."

"No. I said you were making progress. Until I found out you weren't eating again."

I gulped. "Did you really think we wouldn't find the empty cans under the bathroom sink? It's obvious that you poured them down the sink. So, what do you want to do?"

I stood on my feet. "It's obvious that I'm going to leave the first chance that I get. Who would want to stay here?!"

"Okay I guess I should respect your wishes. However, let me ask you this. Do you want to die Kagome?"

"W-what?"

"Do you, want to die?"

"No! What the hell kind of question is that?"

"I'm asking because, at the rate you're going, that's where you'll end up. If you continue to put your body through this harmful process you will die. You won't ever get the chance to be perfect. You'll leave those you love behind, think about what that would do to Sango. Picture the image of you're body lying in a dark 8 by 4 space forever. Decaying, your skin will rot eventually falling off, that's if the maggots don't get to you first. Your eyes will liquefy in your sockets. Your body will excrete the leftover waste. A rotting corpse, floating in it's own feces . So, do you want to die sooner that you have to Kagome?"

I was able to visualize every single thing he had described. That image will be forever burned into my mind. I turned my back to him. "I'm fine. I don't need you. Or anyone for that matter, I can take care of myself."

* * *

I had been staring the at the ceiling for the past half hour. What Shippo had said replayed in my mind over and over again. He didn't know what he was talking about. I wasn't going to die anytime soon. I had this all under control, I knew what my limits were now. Oh well. I pushed the negative thoughts out of my mid, and walked into my bathroom. I keeled down i front of the toilet and spilled my guts out.

Three more days I told myself... only three more days.


	12. Chapter 12 - New girl

**Chapter 12: New Girl**

Only two more days. Two more days and I'd finally be free of this shitty place. I'd been sitting in the courtyard for the past hour. The cold air was finally staring to numb my face and hands. I started at my pale hands, as my fingertips started to turn red. I exhaled, watching the fog creep from my lips. I closed my eyes leaning my head back, reveling in the cold air.

" Kagome!" I was pulled out of my thoughts, at the sound of someone yelling my name.

I turned my head into the voices direction, it was Shippo. "What?!"

"Come meet the new girl."

I stood up stretching my limbs. I walked over to him, dragging my feet. I didn't care who this new girl was, and I didn't want to get to know her. I followed him into the "family room". The others were sitting in a circle. While the new girl sat in the middle, she had her backed turned to me. She slowly turned around, it was... Kagura. She grinned from ear to ear. I could see past her smile though, her eyes showed it all. All her malice, her hatred. She wanted blood, and the way she was looking at me, she looked hell bent on getting it. I was waiting for her to attack me but what she did next surprised me even more. She stood up and held her hand out to me.

"Hello, I'm Kagura. Nice to meet you."

She didn't really expect me to shake it did she?

"Screw this." I turned my back to her, heading straight for Shippo's office. Seconds later he came in, slamming the door.

I tried to speak but he cut me off. "What is wrong with you Higarashi! I will not tolerate the ill treatment of the others. Stop acting as if you are better than everyone. All she did was day hello to you, and you blatantly disrespected her. You have the nerve, the audacity to call them rejects. Well, before you trash talk anyone else. Take a look in the mirror Kagome."

I was planning to tell him everything, how she's the reason I'm in here. After he had just told me off, I didn't even want to be in the same room with him. I stood up, leaving the room. Quietly closing the door behind. I ran straight to my room, locking the door behind me. I sunk to the floor, bringing my knees to my chest. I bit my lip to keep from screaming. I was shaking, trying my best not to cry. What he said affected me so much... but why. Why did I care? He's just some stranger who's paid to "fix" me. I laid on the floor, pressing my face against the cold tiles. Before I knew it, I was drifting off into a sleep.

* * *

There was a loud bang against my door, I was getting really tired of this. I slowly got up off the floor, I honestly didn't want to open the door, but the longer I ignored it the louder the banging became. I swung the door open. Today wasn't my lucky day, it was Kagura. I tried to slam the door in her face, but she shoved her foot into the doorway.

"Open the fucking door!"

She pushed all her weight against the door, shoving it open. I fell backwards slamming into the floor. The next thing I knew she was on top of me. She slapped me, I tried the best to cover my face. She couldn't get to my face, so she went to the next best thing. She pounded on my chest and my stomach. After every blow it became harder and harder to breath. I felt her nails dig into my chest, I felt warm liquid trickling over my shoulder. I don't remember the last time I'd eaten anything, I was to weak to fight back. My lungs were burning from lack of air. Shit... I was blacking out.

* * *

My head throbbed, I slowly opened my eyes. It was bright, I tried to move my arms but the were to sore. I just laid there, I didn't know where I was. At least the bed was soft. I heard a door opening, then footsteps. Whoever it was held my hand.

"Are you awake?"

"Where am I Shippo,"

"You're in the infirmary."

"Kagura?"

"I recommend that she be transferred elsewhere. Now do you want to tell me what happened."

"First, can you close the curtains."

"Sure."

It wasn't as bright now, u could finally open my eyes. I blinked a fee times to clear my blurry vision. He sat at my bedside, and held my hand again.

"What happened, why did she attack you like that?"

"I was trying to tell you who she was yesterday, but you jumped to conclusions that I was just being my usual asshole of a self. She's the reason I'm in here. I met her at school, in the girls bathroom. She had these pills... they made her thin. I wanted to lose weight so fast, I didn't care what it would take. She got me hooked on those pills... and cocaine. We had a falling out, she wanted Sesshomaru but I wouldn't let her have him. I told our principle she had drugs in her locker. They ransacked her locker and found them."

"All of this over a boy?" He rubbed his temples. "How did you know that there were drugs in her locker?"

I sighed. "I had run out of the pills she'd given me. So, I went searching for more and I'd found a more than I'd bargained for. What was in that locker, is what got me locked up in this hell hole."

"I repeat, all of this over a boy you didn't actually have feelings for?"

"At the time I did. I want to be perfect, and i thought he was what I needed to get me where I wanted to be. I didn't want anyone to get in the way of that. I guess I was wrong."

I noticed him staring at me, and it was making me uncomfortable.

"What."

"You still thing you aren't fine the way you are. You're still striving to be 'perfect' , that means you're back to your old ways or you've never changed."

I stared at, not sure what to say.

He nodded. "So you aren't getting better at all."

"Whatever." I said.

"This is why I'm pushing you to stay and get better."

"Wait. What's today's date?"

He looked at his phone. "It's the fifth of January.

I grinned so hard my face hurt.

"Kagome I know you're thinking. Please don't."

"I'm leaving."

He sighed. " Is there anyway I can change your mind?"

"No fucking way."

He let out a heavy sigh. "Fine. Come along."

* * *

I found myself sitting in the courtyard again. This was the only good thing about this place. I was waiting for them to call my name. I wanted nothing more than to be free of this place. I was finally eighteen and nothing was stopping me.


	13. Chapter 13 - Naraku

**Chapter 13: Naraku.**

I'd been home for a couple hours now. It felt different sitting here alone. Even though I was use to being alone. I guess it was different this time, because I knew that Sango wouldn't come busting into my room to ask me about my day. No mom to criticize every move I make. No dad... well he never did much to begin with, but still. There was still something off... I just couldn't tell what it was. I walked over to my dresser and stared into my mirror. Then I finally realized what was off. It was me, I looked how I felt. Which was pretty bad, I was dead inside... even more than usual. I had no one. My family was to chicken shit to face me. I didn't want to see anyone at that God forsaken school. Shippo was the only one that I had left... until I pushed him away.

I threw the tangled mess I called hair in to bun. I didn't care enough to comb it out. Suddenly the doorbell rang.

I sighed "Great."

I ran downstairs swinging the front door open.

"Sesshomaru?"

"Kagome you look... beautiful. These are for you."

I took the flowers from him. "Thanks. What are you doing here?"

"I called the Macintosh for, but the said you'd already checked out. So, here I am."

"OK. Look, I appreciate the flowers and you checking in on me and all. Actually no I don't." I threw the flowers to him. "I didn't want to see anyone especially you."

Confusion played out on his features. 'I don't understand I thought that..."

"While I was away I realized something. I don't actually have feelings for you Sesshomaru. I only wanted you so I could make myself feel better. So thanks for stopping by."

I slammed the door a irritated at the fact that he thought it'd be okay just to pop up on me like that. I grabbed a bottle of water from the kitchen. Then the doorbell rang. Again.

"I thought I told you- You! What are you doing here?!"

"I was in the neighborhood, and thought I'd stop by." His voice was like velvet... it gave me chills. But those ruby red eyes. Those are what frightened me.

"What do you want?"

"Come ride with me."

"Why would I do that?"

"You got my sister thrown into rehab. I think you owe me one."

I bit my tongue. "Fine. Let me grab my keys."

I'm convinced I was attracted to things that weren't good for me.

He put his hand up. "Not looking like that you won't. Go freshen up."

I rolled my eyes. Running back upstairs so I could make myself presentable.

Minutes later I came back down stairs a little better looking than I did before.

He smiled. "That's more like it. Come along." He held his hand out to mine. I shoved it aside, closing the front door behind me.

I heard him chuckle. "This is going to be fun."

* * *

The drive was quick. We were in a neighborhood I'd never seen. The house we had parked in front of was almost as big as mine. I didn't think that someone like him would be middle class...

"Follow me."

I did as told, jogging up the long driveway. He unlocked the door, I stepped inside. The inside was well put together. It even smelled nice. He led me up the stairs, to his bed room. He opened the door letting me walk in first. It smelled like weed, jack Daniels and bad decisions. For some stage reason it comforted me. I guess this is what a junkies dream room smells like. He closed the door behind him. He seared himself on the bed, he patted next to him.

"Sit with me."

"Why am I here?"

"You came with me of your own free will. So maybe you should ask yourself that question."

Shit, he was right. I just didn't want to admit that I didn't want to be alone. I sat next to him, he turned my head towards him. He didn't move he just sat there, looking into my eyes. He tilted my head back, leaned into the crook of my neck and inhaled deeply.

"You smell delightful."

Listening to him speak turned me on. Whether I wanted to admit or not. When did I sink this low?

"I have something for you " he whispered in my ear.

He went over to his dresser, digging into the top drawer. He came back to me with a small vile filled with white powder. My eyes went wide, I instantly knew what it was. It made my heart race just to see it.

"How much?"

"I don't want your money." He said.

"Then what do you want for it?"

"One simple thing."

"Which is?"

"Be mine."


	14. Chapter 14- Be mine

**Chapter 14: "Be mine."**

I blinked a few time, not sure if I heard properly.

"Excuse me?"

"I want you. To be mine. I want to worship the ground you walk on. Since the first time I saw you I wanted you."

I just kept staring at him, what he was saying was sweet in a very creepy way but still sweet. I wasn't sure if he was crazy, high, or if he really wanted me.

He kissed the back of my hand. "I could give you any and everything you could ever want... just give me the chance to prove myself to you."

I pulled my hand away. "No thanks. You can't buy me with drugs. So no. I will not be yours."

I walked towards the door, he wrapped his arms around me... tighter than they should have been.

"I always get what I want." His tongue slid up my neck to my earlobe. He nibbled on it slightly. I enjoyed every second of it.. maybe I really was sick.

No normal person in their right mind would enjoy this, but here I was. In the bed room of someone I barely knew. Just because he asked me to come along. Some one with common sense wouldn't be here.

"Admit it." He whispered. "You don't want to leave."

Was he right? Did I crave someone's company so much that I'd go to these lengths?

"No answer? So I'm right. Just be mine."

He held onto me a little tighter. The sad part is... I didn't want him to let go. What the hell Is wrong with me?

"Fine. I'll be yours, but there are rules that you have to abide by."

He pecked my forehead. "Of course love. Anything for you."

He sat down on the bed pulling me onto his lap.

"Now," he began. "What are these rules of yours?"

"Rule number one. If I say stop, you stop. You never cross the line. Rule number two, spoil me. Attend to my every need. Rule number 3,... love me unconditionally and do me no harm" I'd really do anything to get high...

He grinned at me slyly. "I promise to abide by your rules my love. Now, what about this?" He held up the vile of cocaine to my face.

"I want it."

"Have it you shall. I just need your help with something."

He pulled me closer, his hand gripping my thigh.

I brushed his hands aside. "C-can I use your bathroom?"

He scowled. "It's across the hall."

I ran into the bathroom. Worship me my ass, he just wanted one thing. I was so lonely and needed to get high so badly, that I'd even choose someone whose complete trash to spend my time with. My head was pounding. I checked the medicine cabinet. I found a bottle of Advil, I poured two into my hands knocking them back. I had to get out of here. I staggered out of the bathroom towards the stairs. Everything was spinning. Those pills must have been something else. I tripped, falling into the arms of a stranger.

"Who are you?"

Naraku's voice echoed from behind me. "Kagome this is my friend Kohaku. He's here to party with us."

"Party? What party?"

"The one for us." The stranger said. He licked my earlobe.

I pushed him away, falling backwards.

"You bastard You lured me into a trap!"

He chuckled. "Of course it's a trap. You didn't actually think I wanted you to be mine did you? How stupid could you actually be?"

I felt my eyes starting to water, but I held back my tears. I wouldn't let them see me cry.

"Aww Naraku, I think the poor thing is going to cry."

"Fuck you!" I screamed.

"OHH, feisty. I like it, why don't you come over here and show us a good time."

He grabbed a fist full of my hair, dragging me back into the room. He threw me onto the bed, I spat in his face. He slapped me pretty hard, I could taste my blood in my mouth. I couldn't fight much longer. I was fading away, the drug's were to strong. The last thing I remember, my underwear around my ankles...


	15. Chapter 15 - Only in fairytales

**Chapter 15: "Only in fairy tales"**

I was laying down on something soft. I felt around realizing it was a futon. The right side of my face was sore. Images of what happened flooded my mind. I shot up, my heart racing. The room I was in was unfamiliar, I heard footsteps outside the door. They stopped... my heart pounded even harder. I swallowed the lump in my throat, as I watched the doorknob slowly turn. The door made a terrible creaking sound as it was pushed open. Everything stopped when I saw him, I jumped up. Running towards him. I jumped into his arms, I never thought I'd be this happy to seen him ever again.

"Thank god Shippo."

He pried my arms from around his neck, scowling at me.

"What?"

"Do you know what they could have done to you?! What would have happened if I hadn't been following you!? They were going to rape you Kagome! If i didn't kick the door down when i did...When will you get it through your head, that your life is not something to be played with!"

I hung my head low in shame. "I'm sorry." My voice barely a whisper.

"Sorry!? You're Sorry!? Sorry isn't good enough!"

I looked into his eyes, he was furious, but I also saw the pain he was feeling. His hair cascaded around his face. His face had a slight tint in color, because of how angry he was.

"What... what do you want me to say?"

He grabbed me by the shoulders pressing me against the wall.

"What I want, is for you to not hurt yourself. Or put yourself in harms way. To stop doing the stupid things that you are doing. What I want, is for you to live for yourself and not for others to see you as perfect. That, is what I want."

He laid his forehead on mine, pulling me close to him.

"Just let me help you." He whispered.

"Thank you for saving me."

"I guess you could call me your night and shining armor."

I laughed. "Only if this were a fairy tale."

He wrapped his arms around me, resting in the nape of my neck.

"You know, other people would deem this inappropriate. Therapist and patient, embraced like this how scandalous."

He chuckled. "You always joke at the most inappropriate times Higarashi."

I smiled. "Last name basis again? Just when I thought we were finally getting somewhere."

He looked me in the eyes. His green orbs clashing with my chocolate ones. He tilted my chin upward, we stayed like that for a while.

"Well, are you going to kiss me or what?"

"Not even in your dreams Higarashi. Well start your therapy tomorrow. Be ready."

He pecked my cheek, then walked out.


End file.
